Dat Ass
by LaraJanine
Summary: After Prussia showed Philippines a video he found on youtube, one thing got stuck on her mind: Japan has -dat ass! Rated T for too much mention of 'ass' and the censored part on where Philippines became a potty mouth like Romano. Slight PhilippinesXJapan. Bad Touch Trio is included.


**A/N: Okay, so my friend 'MorningChrysanthemum' and I had a conversation where we make dialogues out of the hetalia characters. It came to our conversation about Japan's ass after she gave ma a link of a video. Of course, there is too much mention of the word 'ass' or 'butt' but we both had to stop somehow. So, we came up with this. PiriHon For The Win!**

**_Sayonara!_**

* * *

Philippines was about to send an important message to her boss through her Facebook account when a certain German - I mean, Prussian called her on the other side of the table.

"Maria, come here and watch this awesome video -kesesese!" he yelled, attracting some of the other nation's attention.

"Okay, just a minute!" Philippines replied as she pressed the 'SEND' button and logged out of her account. Then, she went towards Prussia who was eager to show her an 'awesome video'. She hopes Prussia won't show her his 'Five Steps on How to Conquer Somebody Else's Vital Regions' because that video is - disturbing, if you know what I mean!

"Hurry up, Philippines. It will start soon!"

"Okay! I'm coming!"

* * *

-After watching the video-

"Oh My Gosh!" Philippines staggered backwards, causing her nose to bleed a little. Then, she covered her nose with one hand and she searched for a hankie in her pockets with the other hand.

"Kesesesese! I told you it was awesome 'cuz I'm in it! So, what made your nose bleed? Kesesesesese!" he asked Philippines and handed her a handkerchief. The video is not, after all, Rated SPG.

"I didn't know Japan has - *cough* dat ass *cough*!" Then, as if by fate, Japan passed by them and heard what Philippines have said.

"Excuse me but - what is with my ass?" Japan asked them, grabbing Philippines' and Prussia's shoulders, preventing their escape.

* * *

**====Hetalia!====**

* * *

"Kesesesese! Show me your butt first so I'll know!" Prussia laughed despite the fact that Japan is releasing some auras already.

'Huhuhu! I don't want to die yet - all just because of that ass of his' Philippines thought to herself.

"I repeat, what is with - my ass?" Japan released an even darker aura and it is - awkward!

"It is so t-tiny that I- I c-could h-hol it with one h-hand!" Philippines nervously whispered while stammering. Unfortunately, Japan heard her.

Japan was about to 'lose his head awkwardly' when Prussia went behind him and looked at his ass.

"Oh, yeah! You are right, Philippines! Kesesese! It is so tiny!" Prussia laughed.

"HEY!" Japan yelled.

"Well, you have to admit that I have the sexiest ass in the whole world" Spain came out of nowhere and announced.

"Okay! Enough with the 'Ass' Talk!" Philippines shouted, turning pale at the very mention of ass.

* * *

====Hetalia!====

* * *

"All right! But, still, you inherited Spain's butt so - yeah!" Japan told her as a payback.

"What?" Philippines said as she stomped her foot angrily.

"You heard me! You have the gift of Spain's ass!" Japan smirked at her.

"PHILIPPINES, GO GRAB YOUR RAPE WHISTLE" a voice screamed from the background

"My Danger senses are tingling! One of my ex-colonies is in danger. Maybe - Romano, I'm coming" Spain shouted, punching the air.

"Wait! Spain, it is ME who is in danger!" Philippines shreiked hysterically.

"Oh!" Spain's face became extremely red out of embarassment and he sweatdropped.

"Ohonhonhonhonhon! Since when did Japan became pervy? And they're right about the ass, Philippines. Your ass is from Spain and we are witnesses to that, including moi!" France asked as he popped out of nowhere.

"I SAID ENOUGH WITH THE ASSES!" Philippines screamed as she kicked France's Eiffel Tower.

"Ohoho! Now I'll no longer have any children, Thanks to you!" France whimpered while holding Eiffel Tower.

"Be thankful I didn't used Japan's katana to end that thing once and for all!" Philippines released a strong dark aura.

"I'm sorry! No more 'Ass Talk', okay?" France turned extremely pa,le and so did the rest of the Bad Touch Trio and Japan.

"I don't ********************************************** care for your *****************************, you understand?" Philippines yelled, and an even more scary aura surrounded her, more scary than Russia's.

"All right, mi mija! You had enough time with Romano!" Spain sweatdropped.


End file.
